Lookout Farm Apple Pickin'

We spent a gorrrrrgeous Saturday in September with a gorrrrrgeous family at this gorrrrrrgeous orchard - http://lookoutfarm.com/

We took a fabulous train ride - 

We got to pick a (figurative) ton of delicious apples...

There was some dandelion wishing (pretty sure I could read her lips, and she wished for a baby sister!)

There was a bit of romantic grape-feeding that thoroughly confused the children...

There was even actual family-time-posing-for-pictures!

This awesome farm had a playground!

which happened to have a terrific, pint-sized Caterpillar Train ride that both kids were excited to ride...until one happened to realize he couldn't actually reach the steering wheel while wearing the required seatbelt, and would therefore NOT be controlling the movements of the Caterpillar train =(

'Please, someone get me offa this!' 

Big sis rode it all around the place just fine!

the playground area also had a LEGO house. a big ole house JUST for hanging out and putting together Lego creations!

annnnd a petting zoo! #HiDesmond #ThatGoatWantsYourApple #RunAbbyRun

annnd a pyramid made of hay, perfect for climbing, jumping, snuggling, itching, etc!

Handsome Henry found plenty of exciting things - like hugging mom...calling for mom...and a super fancy red Ford tractor!

...and so did Adorable Abby! #PumpkinSittingChampion

annnd so did dad... #CheatingAtTinyPineTreeMaze *smh

Thanks for taking us along for this super fun family shoot, you guys! You're the apples of our eyes!

Completed pics soon!

I don't know what to call this.

homicide

double homicide

matricide

patricide

never thought those words would be swirling around in my head in conjunction with my little Deep South hometown

Eclectic, Alabama - population as of the last census, 1001.

2 of those people are my parents, on Main Street.

another 2 are my faux parents, over on Ellis-Lazenby.

another 4 are my favorite friend (honorary brother) and his family, on Fleahop.

at least a hundred of those people are my dearly loved ones.

at least another couple hundred are people I know and care about the well-being of, am friends with on Facebook and Instagram, Pinterest and Twitter, say nice things to about their kids, their pets, their birthdays, their anniversaries, their new business ventures, their new cars, their new homes, the passing of their parents or grandparents, their selfies, their new jobs, their divorces, their job losses, their car accidents, their second marriages, their miscarriages, their favorite new novels, the flowers their husbands brought them, the hail damage to their garage, and on

and on

and on

the Internet has made it possible to remain "friends" with our loved ones who are far away, without having to hand write letters to hundreds of people, print and mail pictures of our homes and dogs and children and new hairdos all over the world, thank goodness.

we graduated high school with you, or we were in kindergarten with you - maybe you were our VERY FIRST best friend (looking at you Jennifer B!) or our college roomie for just one year (love you Tiff!), or we baby-sat you 20 years ago and now YOU have babies (owch, Osgoode girls)...

or we were next door neighbors at one point in time, or you are our mom's life-long best friend and we like to keep up with what you and our honorary cousins are doing these days, or you're our ACTUAL cousin but you live on the other side of the planet because you're in the military now.

whomever you are, we care. and the constant ..."contact"...means we care more than people might realize.

my high school friend April - not even 2 weeks ago as I'm typing this ridiculously difficult ...thing...

was shot in the head and killed. 

so was her husband, Mike.

both in my graduating class (ECHS 1997, holla)

I didn't know him, apparently he only did 12th grade at our school? so I don't have any memories of him.

but April....

April was good people. 
I spent 6 years in the same buildings with her, day after day, week after week - and she was good people.

I haven't seen her since we graduated, as far as I can remember.

what she wrote in my senior yearbook...I'm unsure which Chris she was in love with at the time!

Our 20 year high school reunion is going on, right this minute. This whole weekend will be filled with people seeing each other and catching up, hugging, eating, laughing, crying.

April and Mike would've been there, as part of our graduating class who stayed in our tiny hometown and made a life there.

but instead, they were both buried last Saturday. 

                                              photo, I believe, taken by her brother.

They'd be at the homecoming game tonight, cheering their middle son on as he played football for their high school alma mater.

...oh man, I'm going to miss April. Her kind words on Facebook, her fun photos on Instagram, her uplifting and interesting Pinterest pins...

two of the very last things she pinned on Pinterest - amidst a lot of yummy looking recipes, workout moves for a great butt, and BOMB haircuts - 

and my heart breaks. She had the hugest of hearts.

among her last Instagram photos - 

and my heart breaks a little more.

So...writing about it is slightly cathartic, but my actual point here is...

April and Mike have two younger sons - one middle school and one high school aged - who now have to negotiate life without their parents - and possibly without their older brother.

They will likely become the financial responsibility of their other family members - uncles, grandparents, aunts, everyone who loves them and wants to help take care of them in the dark aftermath of their parents' untimely death.

The Owenby's and Holtons will need whatever help we can give them. We - meaning their smaller circle...the broader, larger circle of people who don't know them that well ...and the even larger circle of strangers who don't know them at all, who have never even HEARD of Eclectic Alabama, but who love US and know we love THEM...and so on.

If you pray, they could use prayers. for months and years to come. If you light candles, light one for them. If you meditate, focus on their health and peace for a bit maybe. 

and if you feel like skipping movies and Starbucks for a month, donate that money to help their family cope with expenses they never in a million years dreamed they'd have to cope with:

Click here to donate...https://www.gofundme.com/holtonboys

share the link if you can or can't donate actual money. Casting the net wider will help, I promise.

- janet

grá againn duit seanmháthair

The handsomer half of wood + copper, Will - has this amazing mom, see.

Carolyn was diagnosed with cancer in the fall of 2013 and has been fighting it (HARD) ever since.

She lives way out in Wisconsin, and was scheduled to come spend a few summer weeks with us, like she did last summer - 

Carolyn, her two baby boys, and her sweet daughter-in-love, Crystal floating around Cedar Lake, summer 2015

As the travel dates started to get closer, everyone sort of realized she wasn't quite well enough or strong enough to travel, and all the kids and grandkids in Massachusetts, Connecticut, and Pennsylvania (and some NY family, too!) began booking plane tickets, asking for time off work, finding places to stay, etc - we took the party to her.

This particular branch of the Jacob family tree (the Will, Janet, + Noah branch) decided to road trip it out there, stopping briefly to see Niagara Falls because the signs told us it was only 40 miles out of our way! Such a beautiful place. We plan to go back sometime, when passports are in hand, and see the Canadian side, as well.

This was both mine and Noah's first time in Wisconsin - my first time meeting my sister-in-law Barbara and her babies, and Noah's first time meeting his youngest cousin, Anna - as well as the first time Barbara and her 3 boys have seen Noah in about 8 years! Back when he was a little bitty kindergartner, not a six foot high schooler!

There were many...many games of driveway cousin-vs-cousin basketball ...

and some football tossing...

We had a deLICIOUS taco dinner our first night in town, Nana got lip-sticky kisses from her baby granddaughter, and the sour cream alllllmost went everywhere #itwasagoodnight

it was Will's sister Maureen's birthday that day, so we celebrated with a gluten-free, dairy-free cake (Carolyn's baby sister and her daughter were there to celebrate with us, as well!)

Despite the insane heat, there was PLENTY of hugging, snuggling, kissing, hair-braiding, lap-sitting, hand holding, cuddling - so much affection shown in this lovely family <3

Will decided to shave off his beard - for the first time in...like....5 or 6 years...so his mama could see his face and kiss it good. Everybody else decided to ..add...hair to their faces... what?!

did I mention it was the first time - ever - that all of Carolyn's grandchildren were together in the same place at the same time!? 

We made sure to take plenty of serious *ahem* pictures with our beloved mom-nana-auntie-sister-wife. <3

as the week went on, however, Carolyn's health rapidly declined. A hospital bed was put in her room. Her baby boy, my strong husband, carried her into her bedroom and placed her in it - she stayed in that bed, in her bedroom, until she passed away. We spent a lot of time in that room with her, making sure she was never alone. We sat with her, we sang with her, we played the music she wanted, someone (unnamed - I ain't no snitch) gave her a little whiskey, we held phones for her so she could speak with loved ones for what turned out to be the last time. We cried when she cried. We gave her water, and yogurt. We kissed her. We laughed with her when she laughed. We put her favorite perfume on her. We painted her fingernails all pretty.

We answered her when she asked things like "will my parents be there waiting for me?". We all did what we could, and she held on, listening to Fight Song and garnering strength from various Irish tunes while she waited for her last two grand-babies to arrive on Friday night, July 22nd. Daniel and TJ got there, loving on Nana commenced, spaghetti dinner was had - and we dispersed to the places we were going to sleep. Will spent the night in her room with her, and he dreamed he got to take her dancing, as a young - YOUNG lady, and they swirled the night away. We all just...did what we could.

She passed away, with her firstborn in the room with her, and everyone else not far away, on the morning of the 23rd.

Which also happened to be little Anna's 7th birthday. 
So now ...we have a new family holiday, Anna-Nana Day - celebrating the life of the youngest grandchild, and the life of the funniest, chattiest, booty-shakingest matriarch you ever met.

We had a party, and cake, and presents, and corned beef and cabbage and potatoes and....you guessed it, more Irish music and whiskey - to celebrate both lovely ladies.

Our branch of the Jacob family tree had to leave the following day, but not before....you also guessed THIS - more pictures!

Will and his siblings are back in Wisconsin this weekend for their mother's funeral.

No one expects to lose their mama in their 30's. Please keep Will in your thoughts, your hearts. This is rough on the wood + copper household, as could be expected.

The title of this post means 'we love you, grandmother' in Gaelic. She requested cremation, and asks that her ashes be scattered in Ireland, where her family is from.  

“No one worries about you like your mother, and when she is gone, the world seems unsafe, things that happen unwieldy. You cannot turn to her anymore, and it changes your life forever. There is no one on earth who knew you from the day you were born; who knew why you cried, or when you’d had enough food; who knew exactly what to say when you were hurting; and who encouraged you to grow a good heart. When that layer goes, whatever is left of your childhood goes with her.”

— Adriana Trigiani, Big Stone Gap